I revisited my notes yesterday on Gay Hendricks book, The Big Leap. There are so many good nuggets inside, but the one I needed yesterday after a long chat with a time-tortured client, was this: Newtonian time vs Einsteinian time.
Newtonian time is fixed and limited. It’s what most of us run on. It is outside of us. Einsteinian time, however, gives us our power back when it comes to time. We create the time.
Time is relative, right? Whatever that means …
Let’s just say, we’ve all experienced treadmill time and dentist chair time vs. party time or good date time. With Einsteinian time we can generate time as opposed to constantly being chased by it.
Hendricks says, “Stress and conflict are caused by resistance and lack of ownership.” For instance, I had a whole list of things to do today, but I farted around all morning and suddenly, “There just isn’t enough time in the day!”
I love the quote: “We have the same amount of time in the day as Oprah and Beyonce.”
Let’s be real.
Asking ourselves the question, where in my life am I not taking full ownership?
This alleviates the victimhood of time and helps us drop the storyline that time is a scarce commodity. And it will free up energy typically spent stressing about that which we don’t have enough of.
Language around time is also paramount. Try taking a week off of complaining about time. And in so doing you will see all the time victims out there and how unbecoming it is.
I’m working on it too.
I have a great example: Saturday afternoon I was heading to Kundalini and was pleased to find that both the 3 and 4 Trains were running. That means that the 4 should have been running Express like it typically does. Perfect, I’ll make it to class on time. Yippee. The truth was I’d left the house a little later than I’d hope, so the 4 would be saving my tale.
No. Such. Luck. For whatever reason, not only did the 4 make all the local stops, it also felt like it was going over the river and through the woods to Grandmas. Everyone was huffing and puffing. I could feel myself going there. Surely, I would miss the beginning of class, my favorite part.
By this time I had forgotten that it was my fault for leaving the house late and had taken all my gripes to the train, which sucks and is stupid and I hate it.
All of this lasted about 30 seconds because I asked myself that awesome karate chop question: “Can I control it?”
I took my time back. I transcribed some notes from an audio book and used the time as constructively as possible.
When I reached Union Square, I hurried to class, now nearly 10 minutes late.
When I arrived, the instructor greeted me at the elevator. “Oh great,” she said, “the elevator is finally working. I guess we can start class now.”
I wasn’t late by even a moment. A great lesson to relax, and to take time into our own hands.
I leave you with this: One week: No complaining about time. Pay close attention where you’re using time as a scapegoat rather than taking ownership. Let me know how it goes. I will be reporting back as well.
PS … A rare
two spots one spot has opened in my coaching practice. If you or someone you know could benefit from an accountability partner, kind and loving bullshit detector, and mindfulness-centered biz/life/relationship coach, do holler back–asap. I’m booking initial consultations as early as this week.
Kat Hurley is a transformational author, speaker and personal development coach, making over motivation @The Year of Magical Dreaming. For the full 411, visit kathurley.com, yo!